haven't bought any beer since sunday. however, i somehow have to get all the empty bottles (more than 200) out of here without the security guard noticing. this is tricky because i don't own a car, and i live on the 12th floor.
so i've been carrying out just 2 shopping bags at a time. i'm trying to remain positive, but just looking at all those bottles is a totally scary sight. i honestly don't know how i failed to drink myself to death.
i did have a serious fall last tuesday. ended up slamming my head against the bedroom door. all this blood suddenly dripping down my forehead (some of it got on the new carpet before i could grab some paper towels to soak up all the blood).
i was very afraid. i thought i was dying. alone.
that was the moment i finally figured out i had to stop drinking. now i have to deal with the aftermath. i'm keeping my fingers crossed. i've been very lucky so far. i just hope my luck does not run out.
made it to the library. found a really cool dvd (rope). it's the only hitchcock movie i haven't seen before. also picked up augusten burroughs' memoir about his own battle with booze (dry).
not too shabby. i had a really good day.
just seeing if the comment feature works...
ReplyDeleteI'm a fan and researcher of the actress Joan Crawford, an alcoholic from the '40s through the early '70s. She finally quit drinking in 1974, 3 years before her death from cancer, because of what you just described -- a severe alcohol-related fall that drew blood and left her with a black eye and swollen face. (In a candid latter-day interview, she also mentioned that she stopped drinking because she found herself making phone-calls to people at 3am and then not remembering who or why she'd called.)
ReplyDeleteAs for myself, I was once so drunk and upset at someone that I apparently slammed myself into a door-frame and dislocated my shoulder. (I say "apparently" because I woke up the next morning lying on the floor by the door-frame, with a dislocated shoulder; I never went to a doctor, but it was weeks before I was able to life my left arm properly.)
My dislocated shoulder still wasn't my bottom. But I just wanted to share Joan Crawford's own bottom, which seemed like yours.
ouch. yeah, when i was drunk i was always tripping over stuff, and slamming into walls, door frames, and finally a closed door. but it wasn't until i saw my own blood dripping onto the carpet that i hit my bottom. sudden fear is one of my favorite movies. are you planning on writing a bio about joan crawford? thanks for sharing your story (and crawford's).
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